Saturday, May 31, 2014

Mark of the Beast

While I get the magic oriented theocratic OCA wants to ban gay marriage, abortion, child birth aid, stem cell stuff & other 'unnatural' things and toss out the First Amendment along the way, their latest scheme is a little different.
They are pushing hard for everybody who wants to vote to have a government issued photo ID.
That's nothing Christian. If anything, it's more like anti christ type stuff as in Mark of the Beast? Maybe they think your own mark, your signature, is some kind of horrible gnostic crap assuming too much personal divinity.
Beats me - they're freaks.

Hudson Hub Times story here

Friday, May 30, 2014

Is John Cranley an Alien From Outer Space ?

If you have ever heard or seen an interview with Cincinnati mayor John Cranley, you have likely noticed how awkward and uncomfortable he is. here is an example.
Besides being awkward and uncomfortable, he also says some really weird shit.
I have heard Cincinnatians talk on national stages and, as a non-native Porktowner, wondered why they thought ANYBODY would know ANYTHING about Cincinnati. A phrase you don't hear much around Cincinnati but used to be popular was, "I will gown to Fountain Square and tell everybody …". This was used when somebody wanted to point out that they would publicly stake their reputation on something. Nobody outside of Cincinnati would have an idea what they were talking about but Billy Cunningham said it on the Phil Donahue show and I thought - weird. I had an employer who would tell people he would suck their dicks on Fountain Square if he was wrong about something but I think that had something to do with some weird sex issues….
But I digress.
We were fortunate that he went to NYC with a talented spokeswoman.
Given the awkwardness, bizarreness, discomfort with other people & just the weird shape of the guy, I'm wondering if maybe he's actually a shape shifting, blood drinking, illuminati alien lizard Annunaki man. Maybe even something silicon based with irradescent insect wings.
Maybe, with the right sunglasses we might be able to see him in his alien form. Has anybody seen him naked and lived to tell the tale? Has anybody seen his blood?
Maybe dude should go down to Fountain Square and cut his wrists to prove that he doesn't actually have golden acid blood. He campaigned on bringing transparency to the mayor's office - how could he refuse?

Thursday, May 29, 2014

Cranley Snubbed !!

Atlanta's mayor is at Bilderberg - why not John Cranley ?

Wednesday, May 28, 2014

Vampire Girl vs Frankenstein Girl

Like a bit of Portlandia with you Tokyo gore? This movie about Japanese kids & trends is a hoot. A Frankenstein style high school girl fights the "new girl", a vampire, over the affections of a seriously WTF'd teen age boy. Great music typically cheesy fights & gore.

Tuesday, May 27, 2014

Monday, May 26, 2014

The Toys Just Get More Expensive

I want one
The Gypsy Graves in Spring Grove Cemetery

While other folks can tell you about the legends, origins, rumors and stuff about the Gypsy graves at Spring Grove Cemetery that are elaborately decorated on Memorial Day, nobody seems to want to tell where the graves are. This can make finding them a bit daunting as Spring Grove is one of the largest cemeteries in the country.
Blogging isn't Cool to the rescue.
Go in the main entrance and go straight. Go through the tunnel/under the bridge and make the first left (west). Follow this a while, at one point you will see the tomb of John Robinson on your right. You might want to stop and make an offering to him in commemoration of all that he did to bring joy, excitement and wonderment to kids and families around the country for so many years. The ladies adorning the entrance are Faith, Hope and Charity.
Proceed on (west). You will come to a pond and the road will bend right around it. Follow this road and then bear left. As you head north you will see a chain link fence to your left. It will become a brick wall. When you see an iron gate in the wall - stop.
The graves are to your right on that road and the next couple up ahead.
The grave sites are usually family sites that center around a large memorial stone. Some stones have pillars and some use the marking of a thistle. They are made of both red and grey granite. They decorated around Memorial Day with massive displays of flowers and other decorations and are frequently draped with purple bunting. It's probably about as close to a Day of the Dead as we get up here in whitebread Ohio.
While this may seem like a queer and curious custom, it is serious poo to the folks involved, so, if you go, don't gawk, don't mess with the displays, don't take pictures of mourning people - be respectful.

Sunday, May 25, 2014

The Licensed Cyclist

I often hear motorists bitch, whine & moan about how they need licenses & license plates but none of those demon spawn bicyclists do.
So here's why
Early Saturday, May 24, 2014, one car on a straight, flat stretch of road with a 25 MPH speed limit managed to take out 3 utility poles & 1 storefront in a neighborhood business district.
Try, just try doing that on a bicycle.

Not much more at WKRC

Thursday, May 22, 2014

Churches and Bicycles

Living in an older American Community, Cincinnati, Ohio, I see an issue that I want to correct but don't know how.
In the rust belt cities a crucial element of their development was the church and a significant remnant of the built environment are the churches.
With population decline and people (like myself) being less inclined to attend churches they are increasingly being abandoned or floundering.
Stand in front of First Lutheran on Race St & look around. You can see about a half dozen churches and when blocked from view, you can see even more steeples. Some of these churches are active, some abandoned, and some active churches are desperately floundering. One is being transformed into a bar.
In the Northside neighborhood of Cincinnati there are about a dozen churches but only about 3 still minister to their original denomination. One is a cookie factory, one is a home (but used to be a pickle factory, GAR HQ and, I think, a Turner HQ).
Churches minus religion are, essentially community centers but how many community centers do we need? People who do attend churches are more likely to go to mega churches located in big box hardware stores & movie theaters & such. Don't get me started on the sacred & the profane on these matters…
So, what do we do with them?
Religion is not immune to the free market & is constantly evolving to remain relevant to the evolving societies it is in. When the Protestants split off from the Catholic Church, the Catholics didn't just sit on their hands. When American Protestants flocked to the Catholic Christmas services, the Protestant churches started offering them, too. The Catholic church begrudgingly accepted divorce & now some churches are accepting same sex marriage.
I've been meaning to address this issue but it goes beyond one post. What got me to actually typing today was an announcement made by the Queen City Bike club listing their Bike Friendly Destinations. There is one church on the list. Dunno why - maybe QCB didn't reach out to the churches. But, with the rise in popularity of bicycling, maybe just reaching out to cyclists might be a way for existing churches to remain relevant, infuse some new blood & maybe thrive again.
A long time ago I ran across a group called The Out Spokin'. Yeah, corny…
They were a Christian group that did group bicycling/camping trips. They seemed almost military in their organization but they all had to rely on each other to do their chores, repairs & stuff so they built some kind of bond (kinda cultish, maybe…).
Anyway, I know chasing bicyclists isn't going to fill the pews up anytime soon but I will likely have more lame ideas to revive the churches & revitalize midwestern cities.
PS, I might be out soon to attend The Bilderberg meetings. Dunno, my invitation appears to be lost in the mail

Wednesday, May 21, 2014

The Cranley Carnival

While Jay Kincaid and Kevin Osborne spin like dervishes Cranely's administration careens on like a mad carnival bereft of logic and proportion with interim City Managers, interim spokeswomen, and interim budget directos. Now Cranley says the Cranley budget is a Stiles budget. How's the underside of the bus look, Scott?
Cranley & Murray to continue to pursue their Big Trash policies and, when councilmembers ask when the policies on biking switched from transportation to recreation, they're told to RTFA, assholes.
The collegiality, transparency & progress is exhilarating.

Tuesday, May 20, 2014

This is what I'm Talking about

Romania's prime minister is looking at eliminating and merging 92 taxes and fees. While the overall cost to the taxpayer & the revenue collected by the state won't change much the accounting & time wasted dealing with all the individual charges will be vastly reduced saving the citizens time, money and promoting more investment which should generate more revenue for the state.
When people whine about the American corporate tax rate, they ignore the fact that the USA has fewer taxes than most countries. The USA overall tax rate is actually very competitive but it's still mired by bureaucracy that stifles investment.
Increasing and creating new fees, as Cincinnati's Mayor John Cranley has proposed, is absolutely the wrong way to go.

Friday, May 16, 2014

The Pirates of Cow Town

Columbus' raid on the counties, Townships & Municipalities has not gone unnoticed, at least, in Hamilton County. The HamCo Auditor published a rather scathing report discussing what's been taken from the citizens & their local jurisdictions solely to overflow the capitol's coffers.
State support for local governments was never some kind of benevolent gift from Columbus. The Local Government Fund dates back to the 1930s. It was instituted and increased over the years as the State eliminated local tax sources taking the income but promising to share it with local governments. The property tax rollbacks came with the Ohio income tax and its increase in the 1970s and 1980s. The State promised to share that additional revenue with localities to reduce local property taxes.
The past promises have been conveniently forgotten.
Ohio’s latest state surplus almost equals what was taken from the Local Government Fund.
Ed Fitzgerald

Sacred Life

While the US Military & CDC engage in (reportedly) mock zombie apocalypses, the military is also experimenting with electronics and such to augment the soldier. Well I say augment, promoters say 'complete'.
In other words, the technology in future armor will really complete humans
Twenty-five years from now, we may be to the point where the sensors are embedded in the skin and the person becomes the processor
But how will this affect the soldier psychologically? Will he feel removed from the mainstream unaugmented / incomplete human? Might he question even defending the 'normal' from the undead? Or would he see the scourge of the zombie as an aid in wiping out the old & ineffectual.
Indeed, what will life become when the world is populated by three semi distinct lifeforms - humans, zombies & cyborgs? Will any or all be deemed 'sacred' life forms?
No doubt the cyborgs will find some strange machine god & homo incompletus will stick to his sky gods but what of the zombie? Will the horde instinctively recognize some uniting putrefactive spirit?
For that matter, couldn't the god that makes life sacred actually be some evolving thing that transcends all 3 worlds of existence?
No doubt there will be blood, embalming fluid & oil spilt before it's all over but what will be left when the dust settles?
Ken Ham accusing Pat Robertson of Paganism?

NBR on the Super Soldier

Foreign Policy on Zombie Apocalypse Preparedness

Glenn's take on Ken & Pat

Thursday, May 15, 2014


We need this guy over here...
pfah - goofy Eurotrash embed code... here Voteman

Reasons to Commit

Eye Opening has a collection of photos from old mental institutions. Some of them are of people suffering mental illness & being restrained, etc..
This one caught my eye as a list of actual reasons for admission into the Trans-Allegheny Lunatic Asylum from 1864 - 1889.

A few of these seemed kinda strange like Novel Reading?
Over Study of Religion - like the clergy?
Tobacco & Masturbation - since masturbation is also listed, I guess this was a popular fetish at the time?
Politics - well, yeah, most politicians should probably be committed
Bad Company - is this about politics again?
Shooting of Daughter - because everybody can relate to killing a son
Excessive Sexual Abuse - as opposed to Acceptable Sexual Abuse

Kinda strange. Probably stranger to just throw mentally ill people into prison nowadays, tho.

Wednesday, May 14, 2014

Branding Rail

Typical Transit User
Cincinnati's Metro is looking for someone to brand the Cincinnati Streetcar.
The Southwest Ohio Regional Transit Authority is seeking proposals for RFP 20-14 for Streetcar Brand Development. Proposal instructions, specifications and contractual terms and conditions may be obtained by contacting SORTA's Procurement Department, Lyndi Bryan at
Given the horrors of mass transit, the dangerous route the proposed line might take, the fact that it might even go to Price Hill - I imagine horror should be the main theme. Flames, blood, skulls, ominous music, explosions…
Branding Beat offers this.
The idea of frightening the rider is only half of what they need to do. They need to scare the crap out of every ped, cyclist & motorist that might come into contact with the murderous metal leviathan as it screeches along it's tracks.
I'm tellin' ya maaaaaannn, Horror Sells.

Monday, May 12, 2014

Who Needs a Bridge ?

Ditch the highway, ditch the million lane bridge. For a cool $45,000, you can pedal to the river & then just fly to the other side. By 2020 everybode will be doing it!

Hammasker Schlamascker catalog here

Saturday, May 10, 2014

Friday, May 09, 2014

Saturday Afternoon

Something tells me nothing's happening at the zoo.
Art sales in the park? check
Mansion Tours? natch
Record fairs? gotcha
Puppet shows? Reggae? Vinyl? Creepy Ceramics?you bet!
heck, you can even pull weeds if you want!
Set the controls for the heart of the Queen City & check out Clifton & Northside Saturday, May 10.
And when you wake up in the gutter Sunday morning - don't worry (much) 'cause you will be in the brunch capitol of the galaxy.

Art in the Park
11AM - 4PM
4001 Hamilton Avenue

Northside Second Saturday
6 - 10PM

Historic Mansions of Lafayette
1 - 5PM
Cincinnati Women's Club
330 Lafayette Avenue

Northside Record Fair
11AM - 4PM
North Presbyterian Church
4222 Hamilton Avenue

Room With A View: Mixed Media Cigar Box Experiences
6 - 11PM
Bathroom Gallery
4029 Hamilton Avenue

Mark Klish Trunk Show
6 - 100PM
Marketside Mercantile
4170 Hamilton Avenue

CRASH: Cute and/or Creepy Porcelain
6 - 10 PM
4037 Hamilton Avenue

Basement Reggae Night
The Comet
4579 Hamilton Avenue

Northside Tavern
4163 Hamilton Avenue

Hook & Ladder
4114 Hamilton Avenue

Thursday, May 08, 2014

Standing Your Ground

11 years ago today, a guy in the Northside neighborhood of Cincinnati, OH, after an uneventful Citizens on Patrol patrol, stopped into a neighborhood bar on his way home. Then things went terribly wrong.
Two guys charged in brandishing guns and announcing a robbery.
The Citizen on Patrol guy pulled out his pistol & shot one of the robbers in the neck. The other one fled but was caught.
The problem was, in Ohio, it was illegal to take a gun into a bar. So, the guy who saved the day got arrested. Folks in the neighborhood quickly pooled resources & raised his bond while one perp couldn't raise bond & the guy who got shot went to the hospital.
Then came the cool part. The Grand Jury refused to indict the shooter. They said people were fed up with crime & chaos.
He still got kicked out of Citizens on Patrol. Police suggested he run for city council.
Later, that fall, there was an open carry march in the neighborhood to promote concealed carry in Ohio which eventually passed.
For two hours, it made Northside what one Ohio police chief called "the safest neighborhood in the state."
City Bleat interviewed the guy

Fishwarp article

Free Republic article about the march

Ohio Open Carry article

Wednesday, May 07, 2014

Sound Off

In the discussion of the charnel house that we call the US Highway system, the topic is usually focussed on the bumper car aspect of fellow drivers careening into one another in a mad chaotic dance. But there are other victims of the cyborgic mayhem - the road crews that keep the whole thing going.
Giant blinky signs & arrows are routinely overlooked by the speed crazed motorist, so, in Missouri, they have tried sound alerts to wake up the caged & comatose.
Perhaps this is something bicyclists could do. It could be as simple as riding around screaming at the sky or maybe some sort of siren whistle sort of deal generated by the turning wheels.
The trick is channeling the sound in a narrow path in front of the rider since most bike car collisions occur when people pull out in front of one another. Dunno how much the navy doohickey used by the MODOT weighs but I'm guessing nobody wants to lug it around on a bike.

Thursday, May 01, 2014

Pour les Nerds

I worked on this poster at a pre-press shop around 1984. I used a Crosfield scanner & the photo came in as a retouched 8x10 transparency. The scanner was a large drum scanner that used an arc lamp for a light source. It was a two part beast that cost about $200,000 and required a special controlled environment. One piece was the analyse side & the other was an expose side. You didn't scan to a file you just digitized & streamed the info from the analyse side to the expose side (in a darkroom) where green lasers zapped out halftone dots onto a film for the 4 printing colors.
This was pre Photoshop but the scanner had a number of color correction controls found in Photoshop like curves, levels & selective color and it had USM, UCR & GCR (or PCR) that smokes Photoshop to this day.
Anyway, there was no visual preview, the operator just had to go by the numbers. He had to memorize a bunch of numbers too, because there was no GUI with pop down menus. He had to input the 'cal' number to get to the operation he wanted to perform.
Somewhere along the line, Crosfield came up with a gizmo called a Scan View. Not only did it give the operator a visual preview, it gave him the ability 'mask' sort of like Photoshop's Select>Color Range. You were limited to 4, I think.
It was a large console thing that kinda looked like an arcade video game like Galagia (SP?). The keypad was pretty much the same as the scanner's. It had a track ball to move the cursor around the image.
The scanner was attached to a really dumb computer called a Scanner Display Terminal (SDT) that allowed the operator to save set ups & automate tasks. It ran on 2 7" floppy disks. Formatting & initialising these things took about 14 steps back in the old days.
I cannot remember exactly how you scanned to the Scan View but the operator would take the 7"floppy with the set up over to the Scan View, insert it & call up the setup & after further edits, save & take it back to the SDT to scan the art.
This particular transparency, because it had been chemically altered, wasn't seen well by the scanner so I globbed it onto the Scan View to use the masking functions to get some of the shoes that weren't coming up right. It was one of the few times we ever used it for something other than just messing around. No idea if the dot etcher worked the films afterward or not.
Maybe I should change the name of this blog to Grandpa's Slide Show...

Let the Games Begin

Cincinnati's Central Parkway 'Protected' bike path appears to be a go.
'Mann's Bend' will permanently eradicate more than a dozen mature trees to save 2 hours of parking on early weekday mornings for businesses that do not open before the parking restriction ends.
Furthermore it will upend thousands of years of roadway traditions & force motorists cum pedestrians to cross the 'protected' bike path to get to the sidewalk.
In the picture above, from the Gotham City's DOT, there appears to be a designated crosswalk. I do not know what to expect in Cincinnati. Most likely, motorists cum pedestrians will just cut across in front of or behind their parked cars.
How will this work in the dark winter mornings with commuting cyclists & distracted peds on their phones?

Bizniz Courier article here.